Saturday, July 29, 2006

Those were the days.

Maura had cuter hair than me. Ross and I were eating. Matthew was wacky/cute. Matt loved Colonial Williamsburg. Oh, wait. Everything is still the same. It's comforting, really.

Benny and the Jets can never defeat the Sharks.

Ross and I spent a lovely Friday evening getting fat. We ate taquitos, fritos, Doritos, Oreos, and other foods ending with "o". As we gobbled down our O food, we watched our latest NetFlix arrival, West Side Story. I warned Ross that I would be singing for the entire 2 hours and 20 minutes, and he assured me that he remembered the movie and knew the songs, too. How could I have been so stupid?

As we watched the Overture (yes, there is an overture in the movie), he asked me how that song went that the guy and the girl sang to each other.

Ross: Does it go, "When you get stuck between the moon and New York City..."?

Me: No. That's from Arthur. This movie is a little different.

Realizing the "hilarity" of his mistake, he obviously ran with it, insisting that was the song they sang for each other and kept asking as the movie went on when they were going to sing that song.

As we watched the conflict between the Jets and the Sharks unfold, Ross made an emphatic delcaration.

Ross: Benny and the Jets can never defeat the Sharks. The Sharks are Puerto Rican so they are much cooler.

Me: Benny and the Jets was actually an Elton John song and there is no one in the movie named Benny.

More recgonition of his "hilariousness" ensued and he spent most of the rest of the movie making this declaration. That is, until he got bored and said he was done watching the movie. I fooled him and told him he was going to miss the dramatic climax (keep in mind that this was after everyone has been killed and all of the frantic running, singing, and dancing had commenced). As the credits ran after the somber reconcilliation of the two gangs, I felt some satisfaction for making Ross watch the last few minutes during which I'm sure he was thinking, "When is someone gonna freak out and kill everyone?"

I spent some time last night thinking about why watching movies with Ross is what it is. When agreeing to watch a movie with him, you are agreeing to spend the majority of the movie identifying people for him and correcting his misconceptions about what is going on. I tell myself that this happens, not because he is lacking intelligence, but rather he has so much information packed into his brain from reading the Internet all day that things are bound to get mixed up. Yeah.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

More announcements.

No more Spanish. I got confused. So, I guess you will all get Alzheimer's afterall.

I've added a site meter to my blog finally. It's sad to look at now. Please tell your friends to come read it.

I submitted a volunteer application to the SPCA so I can be a do-gooder.

Cole slaw is delicious.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement to make.

ALL, yes that would be ALL, of my students passed the Reading and Science tests. 100%. Todo. Every single child that I taught Reading and Science to passed. This is after 100% passed the Writing test in March. Needless to say, I am bouncing off the walls and my principal is very happy with me.


I have changed the settings on my blog to Spanish. This will exercise your brain as you try to make comments. You will thank me later as you realize that my decision has delayed the onset of Alzheimer's. Thank yous will accepted in the forms of cash, puppies, and diamonds.

Monday, July 24, 2006

The Ultimate Sacrifice.

I hit a new low today. I have got baby fever to the max. I'm ready. I'm over thinking about myself and just worrying about me. I'm ready to move on in life and be responsible for a child, to take care of someone and raise them in a way that will allow them to make a positive contribution to the world. I look at children as a responsibility given to you by God. It's like He's saying, "Here, this is mine. Please take care of it for me." I'm ready to gladly accept the challenge. But, we're both not there yet, and if you're both not ready, then you're not ready period. It's obviously not the time and I need to deal with it. Easier said than done, but I'm working on it.

Anyway, Ross is being awesome about the whole thing. He's being supportive and loving and understanding. And tonight he took me to Friendly's for dinner. He hates Friendly's. Most people do. I, however, love Friendly's. Not for ice cream, but for a full, sit down dinner. I ordered the same thing I've been ordering there since I learned how to speak. It was glorious. And Ross let me get a soda, too, even though sodas at restaurants cost $1.50. It's these small things that show me how just wants me to be happy, and I love him for it so much.

I got a wonderful email from my friend Stephanie today, helping me out with this whole baby thing. She said:
Hello my dear friend
This morning in the shower, which is where I do my best thinking as you may already know, I was thinking of you and our conversation last night. I think you are right where you need to be. You can do a lot of things without guys as I well know, however you can't make a baby without one. I think there is a pretty good reason for that. I think God has a very special time for your baby when it will have the best dad it can have. Ross isn't going to be the best dad ever until he thinks he can be, whether that be tomorrow afternoon or 5 years from now. Either way you will have a beautiful baby that will be spoiled by me. I think those are all the wise words I have for this morning. Have a lovely Monday. Day is coming up here on Friday night, feel free to jump in the car with her!....once you have a baby you can't do that you know.


For someone so small, she is very wise. Anyway, she's right. Completely and totally. When the time comes, my wonderful husband will be the best dad ever and our children will be very lucky. I mean, he went to Friendly's, for Pete's sake, and he did that for me. Can you imagine what he would do for his own children? I'm a lucky lady.

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Sleeping but not proud of it.

A year and half ago I was diagnosed with chronic anxiety. My condition caused abnormal stress levels, heart palpitations, and insomnia. Since my diagnosis, I have been on two medications: Lexapro (to help boost my seratonin) and Clonazepam (to be taken at night to help shut of my brain and keep me from fixating on things). Since going on these medications I have realized how normal people react to stressful situations, and I've also been blessed with what a real night's sleep feels like. Since getting on these meds, I've been happier, healthier, and much more easy going.

A couple days ago, I ran out of the Clonazepam. Being that it's the summer and I am considerably less stressed out then than during the school year, I thought I'd just see how would do without taking it for a couple days. Maybe my balanced seratonin levels would be enough to allow me to rest. No go. I didn't sleep for three nights. I didn't allow myself to nap on the days in between, thinking that would help. Still no go. The second the lights went out, off my brain went on tangents in every directions while my nervous habits, i.e. rubbing my eyebrows and grinding my teeth, came swooping back to join me. It was maddening.

Not only was I exhausted, I felt weak and disappointed in myself. I hated how I needed a pill to help me go to sleep. I don't know why I care. My doctor prescribed these for me and told me that when patients have anxiety to the point where they need medication, that's usually because the coping strategies that other people use aren't enough for those patients. I got the pills filled and got a good night's sleep last night. Still, I hate that I might have to be on them forever. Why can't I just calm myself down, shut up, and relax?

Any thoughts?

Saturday, July 22, 2006

And Bob's your uncle.

I spent my Saturday helping Ross and Ryan prime and paint the PharrOut office over on Main Street. First we primed the walls and then began applying their selected wall color. Let's just say it's orange. I think it'll look awesome once it's finished, but Ross and Ryan are being girls about it and keep himming and hawing. They can't do anything about it, though. It's up there and I'm sure as hell not priming anything again. Hopefully they'll get it done in time for Scott's triumphant return from Babytown (yes, the baby was born on Wednesday, it is a girl, she is big, she is super cute, etc. etc.) and the world will be as it should be once again. Let's just say, ever since Christi went into labor, I have had a very nervous husband and we are all counting the days until the end of Scott's paternity leave. Anyway, the second coat goes on tomorrow. Not sure if I'll be there for that part. I mean, I donated like 7 hours of my precious napping/tv watching time to help. I got to make up for lost time tomorrow.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

He didn't understand the words that were coming out of my mouth.

Tonight Ross and I had dinner at the Olive Garden, which was lovely. Many of you know that we are on our supertight budget, but thanks to a gift card from los padres de Remus, we got to treat ourselves to some fine, I-talian cuisine. After gorging ourselves on breadsticks, salad, and other fabulous carbohydrates (and having our first real conversation in many months-meaning we didn't talk about Star Trek or bikes), we passed our card along to the waitress. The card covered all of our meal, but only about half of our tip. The meal itself cost $22.52. That left us with a $2.48 balance on the card. You're with me, right? Being the sister of a server, I couldn't leave that measly little tip-we wanted to go with closer to $5.00. Still with me? So, I proceed to fill in the charge slip and tip the waitress the remaining $2.48, planning on leaving an additional $2.00 in cash for the lovely young lady who kept feeding our fat faces all night. I hope you're still with me, because that was where Ross's mind was completely blown. He looked at what I was doing, shook his head and said "No..." (and those of you who know Ross know exactly what that "no" sounded like), grabbed the slip, scratched out what I wrote, and filled in $4.48 on the tip line of the charge slip. The charge slip that showed we only had $2.48 left on the card. Meaning we would have, in fact, owed the server $2.00. $2.00 that I was planning on leaving on the table. $2.00 that Ross insisted we didn't have to leave on the table because we had written on the slip that we were giving it to our server.

After much yelling/whispering at ultrasonic levels and gesticulating to get my point across, my blood boiling with each smug wag of Ross's head, the muscles in his face relaxed, his eyes opened wide as if he had just been revealed the secret to eternal youth, and he said "Ohhhhhhhhh." Flabbergasted, I snatched back the slip, filled in the *correct* amount, tossed the cash on the table, and stalked out of the restaurant. Don't worry. I took Ross with me.

Moral of the story: If you ever get a check from Ross made out for $1,868,769,980,342.78 I wouldn't cash it because he probably doesn't have it, but seems to think it's ok. I like to think that he's really just saying, "If I *had* this, I'd give it to you, man."

Note: I love Ross more than anything. Not in spite of this episode, but because of it.

Praising the Lord for what Ross and I have.

Our family is crazy-wonderful.

We have no debt.

We both have jobs that we love.

We love the city we live in.

Our friends are beautiful, hilarious, good-hearted people.

We love each other more than anything. And we like each other a crazy amount, too.

We've been given far more than we deserve and we know it.

Longing for fall...

As the days drag on through this mid-summer's heat wave, I find myself counting the days until I get to walk outside in long sleeves and real shoes, get in my car, and do something with the day. I spend most of my year in anticipation of summer. For me, summer means the end of the school year, time to clean the slate and wait for the next batch of kiddies to arrive. Honestly though, I get over summer really quickly. It's not in my nature to just sit and not have anything to do. I'm thrilled with any task I'm given and become pitifully reliant on the television and my dogs for entertainment. For me, summer means being trapped in my own head, my brain clicking away with what I want to accomplish but can't yet because it's not time. For me, idle hands mean an overactive, hypersensitive mind that spends its time making up things to worry about.

The fall means back to work, time to use my brain, to occupy myself, to become exhausted and worn out, to not give my brain time to click-click-click away at night because it's too tired to do anything but shut down and let me rest. Yes, I think I'm ready for that again.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Someone please adopt this dog or I might have to.

His name is Jeremy and he's at the Richmond SPCA. I met him yesterday when my mom was looking for a new dog. He's very mellow and is more interested in cuddling than getting into trouble. And when you brush his hair forward he looks like a lion.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

More Dog Stuff, cause that's how I am

So I had to take Zapp into the vet again last week to get her ears checked again. Good news-her ears were clear of infection and it only cost $28 to meet with the vet this time. Anyway, while I was there I asked the vet about the "grapes being toxic to dogs" controversy. He said, in fact, that yes it has been found that grapes can cause liver and other organ damage in dogs, but it's a finding that's popped up only in the last 8-12 months. He said a grape every now and then is fine, but don't let the dogs have access to a whole bunch because they'll think they're for them, eat them, and possibly die. So FYI.

Apparently Shooter loves flowers off all types, real or faux. A couple posts ago I mentioned that I sewed felt flowers on a tank top I have. Shooter first encountered this the other day and he kept smelling the flowers on my chest. The shirt is now draped across the arm of the rocking chair and he keeps coming up to it, gently pressing his nose to it to see if it smells. He exactly like Ferdinand the Bull, a character from a story that makes Ross feel emotion and he therefore cannot read.


So I've been working out almost everyday for 2 weeks, drinking more water, and eating better. But I've gained 4 pounds. W.T.F.

Friday, July 14, 2006

New Developments

My body has become addicted to water as of late. I decided about 1 1/2 weeks ago that I was going to drink a ton of water everyday for 3 weeks until it became a habit (this worked for reading the Bible-Ross and I have been reaidng the Bible every night for almost 2 years because of someone telling us that theory). Well, now if it gets to be noon and I haven't had approx. 2 liters of water, my body basically shuts down. My stomach hurts, my head hurts, and I become very crabby. I guess water is a good thing to be addicted to, though.

In other news, I now sweat an obscene amount when I exercise. We're talking rolling off on me in buckets sweating. Like Gatorade-commercial sweat, except it's not colored. I've been exercising a lot lately, too. This comes more from boredom and poverty, rather than the desire to be healthy. Exercising is the only thing that I can afford to do that keeps me busy. I'm guessing maybe the ridiculous amount of sweat I produce relates to the ridiculous amount of water I consume. But, while it's disgusting, I'm kept very cool during my workouts. The human body. It's an amazing thing.

My mother is either obsessed with me getting pregnant or terrified of me getting pregnant. Everytime I mention that I'm tired or not feeling well (usually a result of the water withdrawal), she immediately asks, "Are you pregnant?" I wonder if she does this with everyone or just me. I think it'd be pretty funny if she did it with everyone, though.

I crafted it up on Wednesday whilst watching Project Runway with some lady friends. I had seen some tank tops in Need with little felt flowers and such sewn on them. These tank tops cost about $40. I realized earlier this week that I a) had felt and b) had a tank top. I put them together and magic happened. Very cute magic if I do say so myself. I wore it yesterday, and I must say it was a hit. Well, it was a hit with Ross since he was the only person I saw yesterday, but it's a start. I mean, he's hip.

I have the best brother in the world. I knew this already, but he sealed the deal today. I went to Diversity Thrift and bought a credenza-something-or-other for the dining room. Upon realizing that it wouldn't fit in my car, I called my brother and offered him lunch to come pick it up and help me load it into my house. Boy howdy, he earned that lunch. My arms are apparently useless, so I wasn't much help to him. Fortunately Peggy, a lady who lives down the street and keeps all of her furniture on her front porch to make room for her plants inside, came to help. She helped Bryan load the monstrosity into the house, telling him that as he lifted it to pretend that he had to pee in his pants and had to hold it in. Apparently this helped and made the lifting easier. The more you know, kids. The more you know.

That's all for now. Oh, btw, the monstrosity originally cost $75, but I got it for $40. I attribute it to my smile and charm, not that it had been sitting in the store for 2 months.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Life view

1. Break a sweat at least once a day.
2. There is never a reason to be rude, especially to people you don't know.
3. Blondes should never leave the house without mascara. Brunettes should never leave the house without blush.
4. Boys (and men) just want you to be proud of them. Be sure to tell them that you are.
5. Park far away so you have to walk.
6. Smart boys will end up with the girls who are goofy. Pretty only gets you so far.
7. If someone constantly refers to things that make them sound smart, they probably aren't that smart.
8. Getting a dog is always a good idea.
9. Along the same lines, dogs should always be allowed on the bed with you.
10. Siblings and cousins are some of the best thing on God's green earth.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Most Popular

Ross and I were talking the other night and we decided that when it really comes down to it, Shooter is the most popular living thing in our house. Zapp is in love with him and Ross and I are constantly pleading with him to cuddle us and play. He's got us all in the palm of his hand. Paw. Oh you know.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

What I did today:

*Got up at 8:15
*Went to church (via bicycle)
*Vaccuumed the entire house
*Did a load of laundry
*Weeded and spiffed up the front flower bed
*Pulled vines in the backyard
*Bug-bombed the shed
*Sprayed the "red-shouldered" bugs who love our backyard and are slowing making their way to the house-many souls were lost
*Called Mexico (the restaurant, not the country) to arrange catering for my sister's shower
*Called my mother to tell her how grown up I was by calling Mexico (still the restaurant, not the country)

I'm amazing.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Can I just say...

that I love Will Ferrell?

Monday, July 03, 2006

My heart explodes with love.

When we give Zapp her ear medicine, we feed her grapes so she will stay still. She love love loves grapes and she will pretty much suffer through anything to get this tasty treat. However, apparently she now associates grapes with having stuff put in her ears. Consequently, whenever she sees a grape, she shakes her head furiously before gladly accepting her snack.

I picked some flowers from one of our bushes out front and put them in a bud vase in our hallway. Shooter likes to gently smell them each time he passes. He too loves grapes. Whenever the fridge is opened, he puts his face as close to them as possible without actually touching them, as not to overstep his boundaries.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Babytown, USA

I got to babysit for Remus, the insanely adorable 4 month-old belonging to Mark and Jen, this evening. I spent my night feeding, changing, bathing, and soothing the somewhat fussy child, and I loved loved loved every single second of it. For some reason I am not at all bothered by the mess or the crying that comes with being around babies. I think it's because I like that I know how to fix it and I know how to make everything ok for them again. Plus, if I do say so myself (and I do), I'm pretty darn good at making them laugh A LOT. So, I go to sleep tonight feeling good about myself and grateful that I have a new little friend. I mean, he better consider me his friend. After all, he chewed on my hand for two hours, spit up on me, and I still wanna hang out with him.

P.S. If you or anyone you know needs a babysitter, let me know. I am not crazy and I have references. And I need money because I am Ross's sugar-mama.