"It stabbed him in the abdomonian!!!!"

These precious words were exclaimed by young Nicholas as he watched the trapdoor spider (we think that's what is was and since I'm the science teacher and I said it, it is so) go about his ferocious feeding habits.

We came across the spider's web while walking out to recess. There are 4 distinct groups out at recess and they are as follows:
1. The kickballers
2. The jungle gym kids
3. The double-dutchers

and my personal favorite...
4. The dirt diggers.

I generally stick with watching the double dutchers and the dirt diggers. It's not my affinity for the letter "d" but rather I fell into both of these groups when I was a kid. I can't double dutch, but sometimes they will cheapen themselves and turn one rope so I can play,

Anyway, the dirt diggers were crawling around on the dew-soaked ground (yes, they all look as if they've pissed themselves by the time we go in) when all of a sudden I saw them all freeze. This is usually what happens when they've found something awesome. A complex web was spread out on the grass, reaching about 12 inches in diameter. The center of the web funneled into a small hole leading to the bottom of the mound of spider gunk. Now, dirt diggers understand that you do not mess with something as amazing as this. There will be no stepping on it or stirring of it with a twig. They must investigate. I was beckoned over, consulted, and it was decided that I should gently prod at the hole with a piece of grass. I did so, and out scurried a big brown spider. Dirt diggers don't shriek, no matter their gender. Instead they explode with shouts of "AWESOME" and "OHMYGOSHTHATISTHECOOLESTTHINGIHAVEEVERSEENINMYLIFE" and the like.

Being the awesome teacher that I am, I told them to go find a cricket to see if we could get the spider to eat it. I thought this would keep them occupied for the remainder of recess, but dirt diggers are a determined folk. They were back in less than five minutes with the lucky representative cupping a cricket in her hands. The young lady then gently (because, I mean, she didn't want to kill the cricket, she wanted to see the spider do it) placed the cricket near the hole in the web, making sure that it got stuck. Then we sat. And we watched.

After about 10 minutes of frantically telling each other to "shhhhhhhhh" and "back up so they wouldn't scare the spider" my little nerdy friends were rewarded. As the cricket made a valiant but futile attempt to leap from the web, the spider bolted out of its hole, jumped on the cricket, and dragged him to his doom down in the hole. This is when dear Nicholas placed his face directly on the grass to peer into the spider's mound and gave us the play-by-play destruction of the cricket's "abdomonian" (it was too funny to correct) and eminent death.

So, what did you do at work today?