This week has been a tough one in Hollywood. The disease of divorce (or the more convenient anullment) is running rampant through those beautiful hills and splashing the personal lives of our favorite people all over the news. And me, being the person that I am, read every detail of their personal pain that is accessible to the public. In doing so I am able to do two things for you: a) Let you know what happened and b) declare a winner.
Let's start with the most short-lived of them all: Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney. Met in April, married in May, seeking annullment in September. One of them is known for having a puffy face that is permanently stuck in a "I just sucked on a lemon" contortion, while the other is known for wearing "second skin" jeans and a cowboy hat. He also has a big head. Maybe for the sake of procreation, it is better that this one is splitsville. WINNER: Gotta go with Renee on this one. The legal papers claim she is seeking the annullment due to fraud. That can never be good.
Next we have Chad Murray and Sophia Bush divorcing after 5 months. Who? Yeah I don't care either. I hear they're on some show on the WB. We don't get that in Richmond so, so what?
Moving on to Tori Spelling and her husband Mr. Tori Spelling, divorcing after 14 months. Met doing a play together and Daddy forked over $1 million + for the star studded nuptials. WINNER: Tie. Tori won't have to keep explaining to people why she married someone who wasn't a bazillionaire and Mr. Tori Spelling won't have to keep looking at her big ol' head anymore.
Now let's discuss Jamie-Lynn "It's a double name" Discala (formerly Siegler) and her hubby/manager A.J., separating after 2 years. First of all, she's celebrity who took her husband's name. That's pretty much a sign that it's not gonna work out: e.g. Susan Sarandon (no longer married to Chris Sarandon but in a relationship with Tim Robbins), Faith Hill (no longer married to whoever it was that had the last name Hill but currently married to Tim McGraw), and Rebecca Romijin-Stamos who had to go through all of the hoopla of adding and then removing the Stamos after her marriage had "run its course." Second of all, Jamie-Lynn's married to her boss. Girls dont' really like that. The couple has hinted at the possibility of a reconcilliation, so no winner can be declared yet. And beside, they seem pretty cute and normal, so we'll keep our fingers crossed.
Perhaps the most shocking recent split is "comediene/red carpet correspondent" Kathy Griffin's decision to file for divorce from her husband of 4 years, Matt Moline, a software engineer. I call it shocking because , I mean, Kathy Griffin is pretty annoying so I would think she'd wanna hang on to anyone who likes hanging out with her. WINNER: Another tie. She gets more publicity and he doesn't have to be married to Kathy Griffin anymore.
That's all for now. But it's only Tuesday and I'm sure new stories of shocking celebrity splits will pop up on People.com or imdb by tomorrow morning.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I do care about Chad and Sophia (even though I am not sure I know who they are) and I will tell you why, Val. I watched the short lived MTV series chronically the filming of House of Wax, which enjoyed an even shorter boxoffice life and they captured Chad's breathtaking proposal, the coordination of which included Chad verbally abusing his personal assistant who admitted to the camera that he didn't think the marriage was a good idea.
And I pleaded to them from my side of the screen not to go through with this clearly doomed commitment but all my efforts were for not.
So I only care because I am a-have to be right asshole and they have proven my point. HA!
Post a Comment